Couch Lock Tea

Couch Lock Tea


  • 1 Part Cream/Milk
  • 2 Parts Water
  • High Quality Herbs
  • Tea (for Flavor)

Note: Weed strength varies and there is no “standard” so quantities may not be given or be approximate. Please use your own judgement when measuring based on your knowledge of the weed you’re using.


Short hand instructions:

  • Milk + Water and bring to a boil, stirring constantly.
  • Set to simmer, steep Cannabis in steeper or bag for 1-2 hours. Stir Constantly.
  • Pour into cup, steep tea for flavor.
  • Serve.

Long Hand Instructions with Specific Details.

I am a “tea-snob” as the call it and seem to know my stuff when it comes to it. Going to college for Culinary and after running a few tests and doing plenty of research, I have decided that there is not a decent recipe to make an herbal drink using cannabis. So mine goes as this:

  • 2 parts water
  • 1 part milk (2% works with this ratio. Using a higher fat content creamer requires there to be less. Half and half is probably the best though I have not tested it.)
  • Depending on how much liquid determines the amount of cannabis. Making 3 cups worth (8-10oz?) use 1 gram of decent quality cannabis bud. You cannot go cheap as it makes the mixed taste awful. Making 5 cups, I used around 2 ¼ g and it still did wonders. For one cup, I would never suggest to use for than ½ g as it may taste like “spinach” as a test subject described it.
  • Bring the liquids, stirring constantly, to a boil and the set it to a simmer.
  • Add the ground cannabis to the mix in some sort of steeper; whether it is a metal tea steeper or a make shift one from a coffee filter. Let steep for 1-2 hours while stirring the mixture. Then remove.
  • Pour into cups and steep a tea for flavor. Best choices would include anything that has a very strong flavor and that mixes well with milk/cream. Any black tea or dessert tea may work. The best I have found is Rooibos Vanilla loose leaf tea. I suggest allowing the tea to steep a few extra minutes for maximum flavor. Loose leaf tea works best, depending on your steeper, because it allows an extra filtering for escaped cannabis.

Sit back, turn on a movie and drink away. You won’t feel it for a while so relax.